Wed, 13 April 2016
Hi ass kickers! Welcome to our first edition of Listener Q & A. You sent me your questions, and I’ve answered them on the podcast. If you’re not familiar with the podcast, simply click the pink player button above to listen, or you can find the Your Kick-Ass Life podcast on iTunes (Apple devices) or Stitcher (Android).
I answered three questions on everything from relationships, to the inner-critic, to setting boundaries. And more! I hope you enjoy listening!
At minute 3:51...
I have three juicy questions for Sara to think about, hopefully that will help her think some about the situation from new perspectives. I let her know she may have unrealistic expectations of this relationship and direct her also to another podcast I did with Christine Hassler, author or Expectation Hangover. If anyone has had disappointing relationships, give that episode a listen!
Even if you don’t have the same situation with in-laws that Sara does, you probably have that person in your life where you have the choice to have a conversation with them about something that is unsaid.
I have been doing a lot of work on my inner critic. Every time I start to let her come out, I write down everything she says and then flip the paper over to write what I would tell a friend if they told me that stuff. I haven't done it in a while but have became more aware of the thoughts and more able to switch the thoughts. I'm super proud to this!!
But I have started to neutralize myself. Like I don't feel anything. I'm not sure where to go from here. Sometimes I feel bad for not being such a worrier. I’m not feeling the emotions the way I want. I'm missing out on true joy. I'm scared if I feel more than all the bad will rush back in. Yes, I don't feel as miserable but I don't feel happiness either. What are some tools to use to get over this numbing.
First, can we give Amy a HELL YES for doing the work? The tool she used there is from the “quick and dirty” section of my 14-day Gremlin e-course.
I’m so glad Amy asked this question-- this is a typical progression for people that work on their inner-critics. They get to a place where they’re like, “Now what?” In this section of the podcast, I take Amy though some additional exercises to get to “feeling the feels” and drop this quote:
I give Amy 2 more tools to use to help her, and refer her to listen to this podcast episode about how hard it is for so many people to lean into JOY.
At the end of this section of the episode, I talk about the importance of friendships when it comes to processing your feelings. Friendships need to be intentional! I talk more about that here.
Even if you’re not the single parent of a child with Autism, this portion of the episode will probably help you. I tell Autumn about one of my favorite sayings from 12 step programs that’s always helpful to let go of what someone else is doing or not doing.
In addition, I provide some helpful resources (my son has Autism too), as well as the importance of self-compassion.
Also, OMG also, I talk about boundaries. Here’s the video I mention of my fairy godmother (and yours), Brené Brown talking about just this:
Lastly, I mention the podcast episode I did with Randi Buckley on setting boundaries.
Ass kickers, I hope this episode was helpful for you and if you have a question you’d like answered in our next edition (coming out in about a month or so), shoot us an email at firstname.lastname@example.org.
Hugs and ass kicking,
Today is the LAST DAY to grab your bonuses with The Self-Love Revolution Master’s Course home-study! Get your self-lovin’ on for under $100 along with badass bonuses!