Make Some Noise with Andrea Owen

Marc Brackett is on the show this week. I heard him on Brené Brown’s podcast, then devoured his work, and knew I needed to have him on the show.  He is the founding director of the Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence and a professor in the Child Study Center at Yale University. His research focuses on the role of emotions and emotional intelligence in learning, decision making, creativity, relationships, health, and both academic and workplace performance. You are going to love this conversation and learn so much. 

In this episode you’ll hear:

  • Why it’s essential to focus on feelings. (7:02)
  • The role emotions play in learning, decision making, and workplace performance. (9:46)
  • What we should be teaching children about emotional intelligence. (15:29)
  • The difference between emotional regulation and emotional intelligence. (23:05)
  • The Mood Meter App: what it is and how it can be used. (28:32)

http://andreaowen.com/398

 

Direct download: MSN-398.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 1:00am EDT

Britt Frank is back! I received so much positive feedback from her first appearance on the show about healing from narcissistic and traumatic relationships, I knew we needed to continue the conversation. For those new to Britt, she is a trauma therapist, teacher, and speaker who specializes in the “Science of Stuck.” Britt's work empowers people to understand the inner mechanisms of their brains and bodies. 

I still had so many questions for Britt, so in this episode, we dive deeper into our conversation about narcissistic relationships, what trauma is and is not, and how to break free from narcissistic abuse or trauma. 

In this episode you’ll hear:

  • The difference between narcissism and a narcissist. 
  • Once someone has identified they are in a relationship with a narcissist - Britt breaks down how to decide whether they should stay or go. 
  • Narcissism is an attachment disorder and stems from childhood - the best way to prevent children from becoming narcissists is to pay attention to them. 
  • Trauma is brain indigestion. 
  • Britt Frank’s opinion on forgiveness. “Anytime we jump to forgiveness at the expense of our own truth, we gaslight ourselves.”
  • Once you are aware of what is happening, Britt offers some ways to cope and break free from narcissistic abuse or trauma.

✨By the way, pre-orders for my next book, Make Some Noise, are open! Grab Your Free Bonuses - including a free webinar on self-confidence coming up on August 5th.
Get all the details at AndreaOwen.com/noise

http://andreaowen.com/397

 

Direct download: MSN-397.mp3
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This week Marc and Angel Chernoff join me on the podcast. They are professional coaches, full-time students of life, and admirers of the human spirit, and have been recognized by Forbes as having "one of the most popular personal development blogs." 

Marc and Angel are also the authors of two books that share over 1000 things people can do to live a happy and successful life. One of the things I love about their books (and our conversation) is that they take some really big topics and simplify them into practical and implementable things we can do in order to be better humans and make the world a better place. 

In this episode you’ll hear:

  • The inspiration behind Marc and Angel’s book, 1000+ Little Things Happy, Successful People Do.
  • Why Marc and Angel say their route into personal development was out of necessity. 
  • What made them decide to write a book about relationships. 
  • Marc and Angel answer the question, “What do I do to get my partner to be interested in personal development as much as I am?” 
  • Advice for someone who feels hopeless or helpless due to life’s circumstances. 
  • Why their book, 1000+ Little Habits of Happy, Successful Relationships, is great for single people too. 
  • Some strategies you can employ when you are feeling burnt out. 
  • Practical ways you can get back to happy and simplify your life. 

PS: We’re looking for your stories about how you’ve made noise in your life. It can be tangible stories like how you transitioned from one job to another or internal work - such as how your self-confidence grew over a number of years. Listeners, you are such a major part of this show and I want to honor your voices and stories. We need to hear more women’s stories. Head over to AndreaOwen.com/Talk to share yours with us.

http://andreaowen.com/396

 

Direct download: MSN-396.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 1:00am EDT

Rae McDaniel is on the show and I’m really excited for you to listen to my conversation with them. We talked about how to be a better ally to the transgender and non-binary community. Plus, Rae has the most fascinating upbringing story which they shared during our time together. 

Rae McDaniel is a non-binary gender and sex therapist-turned-coach who works with transgender/non-binary/questioning folks feeling lost while transitioning their gender identity. Our conversation was interesting and informative. 

In this episode you’ll hear:

  • Rae’s upbringing by parents who were Christian-missionary puppeteers (I had so many questions!). (4:17)
  • Their experience coming out as queer in an unsupportive environment. (7:34)
  • How the narrative that gender transition has to include suffering and anxiety is damaging to transgender and cisgender folks alike. (12:19)
  • Rae’s perspective about anti-transgender and anti-nonbinary laws being pushed in legislation today. (16:54)
  • What it means to be a good ally to the transgender and nonbinary community, plus trans-affirming language and the gender spectrum. (25:00)
  • What to do (and not do) when someone comes out to you. (34:10)
  • Advice for parents who suspect their child might be trans or nonbinary or their child has come out to them, and their feeling a bit lost. (36:15)

http://andreaowen.com/395

 

Direct download: MSN-395.mp3
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This week I’m coaching Hannah, a twenty-five year-old who recently transitioned from working in a non-profit to Corporate America. She came to me for some coaching and insight around issues of wrestling with perfectionism and her battles with negative self-talk. We talked through different scenarios and by the end of our time together, Hannah said our conversation was a “self-awareness wake up call”. 

In this episode you’ll hear:

  • Hannah describes her feeling of being stuck and lack of motivation. 
  • We discuss the idea that the lack of motivation she may be feeling is due to burnout. 
  • The importance of female friendships and how they can be a huge part of a path towards self-care.
  • Recognizing there are seasons of your life where you simply aren’t motivated and that’s okay. 
  • Encouragement to get curious when something is pushing you in a certain direction or belief.

http://andreaowen.com/394

 

Direct download: MSN-394.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 1:00am EDT

This week, I am exploring childhood trauma and how it is at the root of many of the issues that plague us in our adult lives. Riana Milne joins us; she’s a therapist who’s been helping individuals attract and keep emotionally healthy love for over 21 years. 

Riana shares the top ten traumas we experience in childhood and how those traumas impact us. This episode is not about blaming or shaming-- instead, it’s about understanding why we’ve adopted certain coping behaviors and offer strategies towards healing.

In this episode you’ll hear:

  • Riana walks us through her Childhood Trauma Checklist - identifying 10 traumas experienced in our young lives. (5:17)
  • How childhood trauma shows up in love relationships. (29:54)
  • The typical timeline for getting trauma out of the brain and body. (37:57)
  • Mindset for success - a two-part healing process. (37:59)
  • Five things in an emotionally healthy, evolved, and conscientiously aware relationship. (42:05)

I know you’ll find this episode enlightening and perhaps see some of yourself. If you want to dig further, Raina has a free ebook called Attract Healthy Love Now (also great if you’re already in a relationship!). 

http://andreaowen.com/393

 

Direct download: MSN-393.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 1:00am EDT

Erin King is here, y’all! Erin is a best-selling author, 3x entrepreneur, and the CEO of the Socialite Agency.  She’s helped clients ranging from The Academy Awards in Hollywood to The United States Navy at the Pentagon communicate more compellingly using her award-winning PUB method.  If you gravitate towards my energy and the things I teach about (thank you, by the way) - you are going to love Erin!

In this episode we talk about her new book, You're Kind of a Big Deal: Level Up By Unlocking Your Audacity, and how to take bold action. We also talk about the role patriarchy plays in oppressing women’s confidence and how, instead, we can harness Big Deal Energy (the feminine version of Big ‘D’ Energy) to live an audacious life. 

In this episode you’ll hear: 

  • Erin shared her experience pitching her then company, PMS (a tampon delivery service) to a room full of men. (6:30)
  • Leveling up in your personal and professional life takes much more than just confidence and courage… it takes something bigger, bolder and grittier: AUDACITY.   (23:55)
  • Some ways you can begin to activate your audacity to level up. (31:45)
  • Big ‘D’ energy aka Big Deal Energy: knowing you have what it takes. (35:59)

http://andreaowen.com/392

 

Direct download: MSN-392.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 1:00am EDT

Gabrielle Bernstein is on the show this week. For over fifteen years, Gabrielle has been transforming lives—including her own. She is a #1 New York Times bestselling author, having penned eight books including The Universe Has Your Back, Super Attractor and the latest, her first Audible Original, You Are the Guru.

She joined me to discuss some of the tools and practices she uses to relieve anxiety and restore energy, including EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) and cord-cutting meditation. I love it when conversations organically move in their own direction and this one did not disappoint. 

In this episode you’ll hear: 

  • Cord-cutting meditation - what it is and how it can be used to help someone get some closure. (6:10)
  • Gabby walks people through the steps of judgment detox using a technique called Emotional Freedom Technique. (11:04)
  • Methods or tools for relieving anxiety. (17:07)
  • Postpartum depression, time and place for psychiatric support, and why you can’t spiritually override it. Get medicated support to get back to safeline and feel safe enough to live. (20:07)
  • Manifesting is not about getting things, it is about feeling good. (22:55)

http://andreaowen.com/391

 

Direct download: MSN-391.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 1:00am EDT

Kute Blackson is back on the show this week. He joins me for a conversation about surrender, and as many of you may know, surrender is a favorite topic of mine.  That is why when I learned about his new book, The Magic of Surrender, I knew I needed to have him back.

Kute shares how to unravel human tendencies to control the outcome and instead, be willing to be open to life’s possibilities. He is author of the national bestselling book You.Are.The.One. and is widely considered the next generation leader in the field of personal development. I hope you enjoy our conversation.

“The path of surrender, rather than trying to figure out life at every step, is to allow ourselves to be guided by life.” Kute Blackson

In this episode you’ll hear:

  • Why Kute wrote The Magic of Surrender and what he learned about surrendering through watching his mother battle and succumb to cancer. (6:38)
  • Stay open and curious when things don’t work out - that is the beauty of surrender. (14:57)
  • How can one be an activist, act from a place of freedom, and still practice surrendering. (20:49)
  • Giving up the need to know everything and embrace the unknown. (30:18)
  • How you can begin to practice surrender. (34:01)
  • Part of surrendering is showing up and believing that something bigger is possible for you. (43:06)

http://andreaowen.com/390

 

Direct download: MSN-390.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 1:00am EDT

I am on cloud 9 this week because I am revealing the title of my third book, set to be released on August 31st, 2021. And while the book comes out in late August - the celebration starts now. 🎉

In this episode, I share some BTS (behind the scenes) about the title, as well as, read some excerpts from the book. I also share how you can claim book bonuses if you pre-order (yes, you can pre-order now!), be a part of my upcoming book club (led by me), and win a signed copy of my previous books. 

I cannot wait to officially “birth” my next book baby into the world. Of course, they say not to personify your work because you end up holding it too close to your heart. But it's really hard not to do when it is a labor of love. I can't wait for you to read it and I’m grateful to be able to guide you on your path to making noise in your life. 

P.S. I would LOVE, love, love it if shared about my upcoming book! The easiest way is to re-share my social media posts. Thank you!

http://andreaowen.com/389

 

Direct download: MSN-389.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 1:00am EDT

This week I have another coaching session episode. Kylie, a Canadian living in the Netherlands, joins me to explore procrastination around decision making, embracing your sense of adventure even when it’s scary, and where to turn for accountability and support. 

 

My goal for these coaching episodes is that you, along with Kylie, will leave the session with lots of tools in your toolbox to grow, flourish, and be your best self; be proud of the woman you are and take that leap.  

 

In this episode you’ll hear:

 

  • Kylie opened up about her difficulty making decisions and sticking to them. (7:46)
  • What would happen if you embraced the ‘throw caution to the wind’ side of you and lived in the moment? (12:01)
  • Tapping into Kylie’s younger self and her perspective on risk-taking. (17:00)
  • Some ways to get the creative ideas out, accountability, and support. (29:02)
  • We explore what happens when we create standards that feel unattainable. Andrea says, “Never wait for perfection or confidence to fall into your lap…” (42:07)
  • An action-taking update from Kylie. (50:38)

http://andreaowen.com/388

 

Direct download: MSN-388.mp3
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This week I explore the topics of diet culture, body image, and intersectional feminism with guest, Summer Innanen. Summer is a professionally trained coach specializing in body image, self-worth, and confidence. She is the best-selling author of Body Image Remix and creator of You, On Fire – the online group coaching program dedicated to helping people get free from body shame and live life on their own terms. She is also the host of Eat The Rules, a podcast dedicated to anti-dieting, body image, and intersectional feminism.

Personally, I succumbed to diet culture for decades and have been going through a process of unlearning all of the internalized messages that never served me. Extricating oneself from diet culture is a unique journey for every woman. To echo Summer’s words, “Acceptance is not a destination, it’s an ongoing practice of meeting yourself where you are at and where you need to be.” 

In this episode you’ll hear:

  • A brief definition of diet culture and what it revolves around (various layers of oppression). (8:24)
  • For women, worrying about body image is a universal condition and is rooted in internalized misogyny. (12:10)
  • Summer talks about how the way to feel better in your body isn’t about “liking the way you look” and how this can make it harder for us to accept ourselves. (14:14)
  • The importance of knowing the truth about weight science. (23:04)
  • Summer’s response to the assumption that if you accept your body, you're "giving up" and not going to "take care of yourself". (25:27)
  • We can reject diet culture and go on to do amazing things. (32:40)
  • "Tools of avoidance," dieting and fixating on our bodies. (36:00)
  • How diet culture is related to patriarchy and white supremacy. (48:09)

http://andreaowen.com/387

Direct download: MSN-387.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 1:00am EDT

Julie Parker is back on the show! We jump right into the deep end and talk about embracing the parts of yourself you don’t necessarily like, aka your shadow side, and why anyone would want to love their fears. Julie Parker is the Founder of The Beautiful You Coaching Academy where she passionately trains heart-centered people to become life coaches. 

I had a list of questions prepared for Julie and we covered a few. However, when we recorded this conversation, it was in the midst of the Rachel Hollis debacle. So we veered off into a conversation about what it means to be a sacred leader and the role leadership plays within women empowerment and personal development. 

In this episode you’ll hear:

  • Julie talks about “embracing your shadows,”  the parts of us that we don’t necessarily like and holding us back and looking at these parts compassionately and learning from them. (9:22)
  • The importance of keeping a level of curiosity and tapping into it. (13:51)
  • How to love your fears and why someone would want to love them. (20:53)
  • Julie’s experience with people-pleasing and how she came to an understanding about it. (21:18)
  • You can’t talk or think out of the way the stories you make up. (28:52)
  • Julie’s book Priestess and the topic of sacred leadership. (33:58)
  • What it means to be a sacred leader and the role sacred leadership plays within women's empowerment and personal development. (36:31)

http://andreaowen.com/386

 

Direct download: MSN-386final.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 1:00am EDT

Terri Cole is back on the show! Terri is a licensed psychotherapist and global leading expert in female empowerment. And, has experience in many topics, including codependency and boundaries. In this episode, she joins me to talk about boundaries and her new book, Boundary Boss: The Essential to Talk True, And (Finally) Live Free.  

Terri busts common myths about boundaries, as well as the beliefs bestowed on us of what a woman should be and how it plays into having disordered boundaries: “It is more important to be perceived as nice, then perceived as authentic.” According to Terri, that is a setup for a boundary disaster.  

In this episode you’ll hear: 

  • “You teach what you need to learn.” Why Terri decided to write a book about boundaries. (6:58)
  • The art of drawing boundaries with ease and grace does not mean creating conflict. (9:50)
  • Having a unique “Boundary Blueprint,” and common themes Terri sees in her work. (10:49)
  • The biggest myths around setting and enforcing good boundaries. (15:09)
  • How good boundaries can help enhance relationships. (19:09)
  • How boundaries have been tested for people over the last year and how can we use this time to recalibrate. (35:00)
  • A step you can take to stand in your boundary when someone is extremely unhappy with it. (42:30)

http://yourkickasslife.com/385

 

Direct download: MSN-385.mp3
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People evolve and change, right? Well, guess what...this podcast is evolving and changing too! Your Kick-Ass Life has been my baby since 2010, and the name of this podcast since 2013. Because a lot has transpired since that time, I felt it was time to make a change. In this episode, I wanted to share a little bit about what the new name, Make Some Noise, means and why I decided to make the shift. 

Making noise is about speaking up, shining bright, and asking for what you want. It’s about disrupting the narrative about the “box” of conformity we were all taught to fit into. It’s about taking action BEFORE you’re ready in order to build your confidence muscle. All of this and women’s empowerment is an act of rebellion; an act of making noise. 

Now for those of you a bit uncomfortable with change - things will mostly remain the same around here. I’ll continue to bring you interviews, coaching sessions, conversations about shit that matters with unqualified people, and occasional solo episodes.

And here is a sneak peek of what is to come: 

🎉 The title and cover reveal of my new book is coming in May. 

🎉 A new special podcast series that is all about motivating you wherever you are in your life is coming in June. 

🎉 And finally, beginning August 11th I’m doing a special series with a select group of women who come on the show to talk specifically about what it means to make some noise and how to do more of it. 

I want to leave you with a question to think about, today:  How are you making noise in your life? Are you going after your goals and dreams? Are you looking at areas of your life you want to change? Are you setting boundaries? Choosing radical self-care? Disrupting systems of oppression? Interrupting things like misogyny and sexism? Using your voice by voting?  

The way you make noise in your life is yours, it’s unique to you, and I’m so happy to guide you in empowering yourself. Ready? Let’s go. 

Direct download: MSN-384.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 1:00am EDT

This week I have one of the OG’s of the coaching industry on the show, Andrea J. Lee. Andrea joins me to discuss verbal abuse from the perspective of the abuser and being vulnerable enough to sit in that intensity in order to make a change. We also explore how to be bold and kind in a world full of injustice and misgivings. I am excited to share our conversation with you.

Plus, after 8 years and almost 400 episodes, the podcast is getting a new name! The unveiling is coming tomorrow. So keep an eye on the podcast feed for the official announcement. 🎉

In this episode you’ll hear:

  • Andrea J. Lee explains what she means when she describes herself as a futurist with her finger on the pulse of the human spirit. She also explains her experience as “A Canadian-born Taiwanese, cis-gender woman (she/her) who has been brought up with white privilege inside the model minority myth.” (6:06)
  • Andrea J. Lee offers a different perspective on emotional abuse through her digital newsletter - how do you not become the thing you suffered and not become an oppressor yourself. (10:15)
  • How Andrea J. Lee realized she was being verbally abusive to her husband and why she decided to share publically about her experience. (17:35)
  • Being vulnerable and why vulnerability might be held against someone. (19:57)
  • If we are not willing to fully experience the pain we are going through, if we can’t sit in that intensity, we are not going to make a change. (28:53)
  • “It’s possible to be fierce, outraged, bold, and go for your goals while also being kind.” Andrea J. Lee shares some ways to do this when you see injustices happening that anger you. (35:35)

http://yourkickasslife.com/383

 

Direct download: YKAL-383.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 1:00am EDT

You may or may not have seen the latest incident on social media from mega influencer, Rachel Hollis. I made a video talking about my thoughts; mostly because this is an important piece of the women’s empowerment industry. 

If you’re unaware of what happened, there are links below, and I highly encourage you to watch the links posted, as there are women who’ve broken down why her actions are so harmful. 

You can either watch the video or listen to the podcast episode. *Please note that in the podcast episode, I do give a few minutes of my additional thoughts. 

Watch the video here: https://yourkickasslife.com/empowering-women/my-thoughts-on-rachel-hollis-and-womens-empowerment/

Important links:
The video I’m referencing
Trudi Lebron on RH, Leadership, and What We’re Really Doing: live podcast
Jam Gamble on Instagram
Austin Channing Brown on the problem with white feminism
Weeze Doran on Instagram
Hood Feminism by Mikki Kendall

Direct download: My_thoughts_on_Rachel_Hollis_and_womens_empowerment.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 12:21pm EDT

Coaching sessions are back! This week I am coaching Melissa, a production company owner from Southern California, about boundaries within her personal and professional life, as well as, knowing clearly what she wants and asking for it. 

If you are new to the coaching episode format, my style is a mix between traditional coaching and intuitive consulting. And yes, more coaching session episodes will be coming. Also, keep an eye out for some changes on the podcast too. Don’t worry, I am not going anywhere! But, the show is getting a new name and some other fun adjustments. Announcements will be coming next week!

In this episode you’ll hear:

  • Clearly knowing what you want and asking for it. (6:48)
  • Establishing boundaries at work and at home, and enforcing them. (8:35)
  • Betting on yourself and not waiting for confidence to move forward. (24:15)
  • Determining what you will or won’t tolerate in relationships. (31:36)
  • A kick-ass update from Melissa, plus some of her biggest takeaways from our coaching session. (43:16)

http://yourkickasslife.com/382

 

Direct download: YKAL-382final.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 1:00am EDT

Joining me to discuss mental health, as well as, my journey through somatic therapy is my dearest friend, Amy Smith. This isn’t an expert-on-expert episode; instead, it’s two friends talking about a topic from a place of curiosity. 

Here’s some background as to why I wanted to bring you this episode: Last week, Mia Hemstad joined me on the podcast (episode 380). She vulnerably shared the story of her suicidal ideation and major depressive disorder. And, I shared a little bit about my journey too. I wanted to share more of my story, so I decided, this week, to bring you a Conversation About Shit That Matters with Unqualified People. 

In this episode you’ll hear:

  • My breaking point - what led me to a point of complete anxiety and terror. (7:16)
  • About my FaceTime call to Amy, where I opened up about thoughts of suicide ideation. (7:31)
  • How having a friend there to listen, comforted me. (17:03)
  • Amy’s experience being on the other end of that phone call and how she was able to compartmentalize what was happening. (18:23)
  • My somatic therapy journey and how it helped me work through trauma. (26:24)
  • Some thoughts about being supportive to a friend going through a mental crisis. (49:14)

http://yourkickasslife.com/381

 

Direct download: YKAL-381final.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 1:00am EDT

This week Mia Hemstad, mental health advocate and social justice activist, joins me for a discussion about major depressive disorder, the intersection between mental health and politics, and how women can make themselves a priority by doing one small thing a day. 

Mia and I had recorded this episode several months ago. I was waiting to release it for various reasons (which I share in this episode). Like many, I saw the recent interview with Prince Harry and Meghan Markle, where Meghan shared her story of suicide ideation. During my conversation with Mia, she shared her own story of suicide ideation, as did I. Therefore, I felt it was important to share this episode now. It’s relevant and after the year we’ve experienced, an important one to discuss. I hope this episode is helpful to you. 

  • How Mia became a mental health advocate and social justice activist out of necessity. “Mental health and politics are connected.” (6:34)
  • How women can make themselves a priority by doing one small thing a day to nourish themselves.  And, a reminder from Mia that, “Healing is not a checklist.” (15:56)
  • Mia’s major depressive disorder and suicidal ideation story.(26:48)
  • How to handle overwhelming emotions. (46:32)

http://yourkickasslife.com/380

 

Direct download: YKAL-380final.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 1:00am EDT

What do henna, legacy, and living unapologetically all have in common? They are just some of the facets that make up Chelsea Stevenson’s work. Chelsea joins me this week for a conversation about the power in legacy. 

Chelsea is a professional henna artist, business strategist, and homeschooling mother of three. During our time together, we discussed a variety of topics including her motivation for building a table rather than taking a seat at an existing one, and honoring your values. She offered poignant takeaways, including this one, “The decisions we make, the actions we take, and the words we say are powerful. And, we have to own how they impact the world around us.”

In this episode you’ll hear:

  • A brief history of henna and its use as a medium to create art. (4:47)
  • Why Chelsea’s motivation is to build her own table instead of taking a seat at a table that already exists. (7:26)
  • The power in the legacy we leave and why it is important. (8:23)
  • Living unapologetically and honoring your values. (21:58)
  • How Chelsea went from a social worker to a Hennapreneur. (26:56)
  • Struggling with negative self-talk and negativity bias. (33:05)
  • Steps to stand in your authority and position yourself as the artist/entrepreneur/changemaker you want to be in this world. (36:55)

http://yourkickasslife.com/379

 

Direct download: YKAL-379final.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 1:00am EDT

🎉✍ Join Amy Ahlers and I live on Wednesday, March 16th, for a free writing workshop: Top 10 Kick-Ass Tips to Get Your Writing Project Started and Complete.  If you want to write a book, self-publish one, go the traditional route of publishing, or are simply curious about what it takes to launch your next writing project, join us. For all the details and to register, go here. We hope to see you on the 16th! ✍ 🎉 

Speaking of Amy Ahlers, she returns to the show this week to talk about the imposter complex and the inner-critic. Plus, we share some of the ways our inner-mean girl shows up during the creation of our writing projects and some of the strategies we employ to calm her down.

Amy is a Master Women’s Leadership and Life Coach, keynote speaker, and best-selling author. She is on a mission to stop women from self-bullying and being hard on themselves so they can make their greatest possible contribution. Enjoy our conversation! 

In this episode you’ll hear:

  • How imposter complex shows up for women who want to start something new or complete a big project. (3:56)
  • Some ways in which we handle our own imposter complex, including how we change the narrative. (6:39)
  • Experiencing upper limit problems and how we deal. (10:13)
  • Amy answers the question, “Is writing a book for everyone?” (23:30)
  • What we love and do not love about writing. (27:33)

http://yourkickasslife.com/378

 

Direct download: YKAL-378final.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 1:00am EDT

Heather Chauvin is back on the show! Our conversation answers the question, “What is worth your time and energy?” Heather is a leadership coach who helps ambitious, overwhelmed women conquer their fears and become leaders at work and home. She is also the author of the book, Dying to Be a Good Mother

We examine what is truly worthy of your time, discuss emotional regulation and Heather’s Red/Yellow/Green zone methodology. Finally, we explore the topic of managing your energy and surrendering to guilt.  

“You’ve got to feel the discomfort in order to feel the good stuff.” ~ Heather Chauvin

In this episode you’ll hear:

  • How Heather’s grandmother inspired her ‘shit or get off the pot’ moment, and led her to write her first book, Dying to Be a Good Mother. (9:52)
  • Heather shares her Stage-4 Cancer diagnosis journey. (10:27)
  • The “million-dollar minute” concept. “If every sixty seconds of your life is worth one million dollars - are you satisfied with your investment?” (22:23)
  • The Red, Yellow, and Green Zones and how they can be used in your life and at work. (28:30)
  • Energetic time management is reverse engineering of how you want to feel. (33:31)
  • A conversation about guilt: “Who benefits from you feeling guilty?” (36:04)

http://yourkickasslife.com/377

 

Direct download: YKAL-377final.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 1:00am EDT

I have one of my favorite people back on the show, Samantha Bennett! Sam is an artist, writer, poet, actress, and creativity/productivity, specialist. She is also a dear friend. She re-joins me to talk about a variety of personal development topics, including friendships, the concept of re-parenting yourself, and how to handle disappointment.  

Sam is the creator of The Organized Artist Company, dedicated to helping tens of thousands of creative people get unstuck, helping them to focus and move forward on their goals. This episode is very much a ‘greatest hits’ compilation between Sam and me. We hope you enjoy it! 

In this episode you’ll hear:

  • Handling life’s disappointments and giving yourself grace. “Disappointment is taking score too soon.” (10:40)
  • Some helpful strategies for re-parenting yourself. (15:59)
  • Sam helps us to think about productivity in a different way. (19:13)
  • Nothing is more important than your transformation. (31:46)
  • The one thing that determines the quality of your life. (35:44)

http://yourkickasslife.com/376

 

Direct download: YKAL-376final.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 1:00am EDT

Have you ever been in a situation where you had to be something you didn’t intend to be? Maybe it was taking care of aging parents, or you were thrust into single-motherhood. That is what this week’s guest refers to as an Accidental Alpha Woman. Author and Master Certified Coach, Karen Wright, joins me to talk about being the accidental alpha woman, how to reconnect with the real you, and create a life that has more ease.

We also discuss what it means to be strong as a woman, dealing with judgment, and not making yourself small at the expense of others' comfort. I hope you enjoy our conversation. 

In this episode you’ll hear:

  • How Karen’s personal experience inspired her to write, “The Accidental Alpha Woman,” plus she explains what an Accidental Alpha Woman is. (4:16)
  • The importance of identifying your values and how that can help define what is important to you in a relationship. (11:00)
  • The reason women feel the need to “carry the world on their shoulders” and be strong. (12:09)
  • How to reconnect with the real “you” and create a life that has greater community, ease, and fun using the R.E.C.E.I.V.E framework. (25:22)
  • Why it’s important for women to find their voice. (28:33)
  • Internalized misogyny and the alpha woman. (33:52)

Book Giveaway! We are giving away two copies of Karen Wright’s book, Accidental Alpha Woman. Listen to this episode for all the details! 

http://yourkickasslife.com/375

 

Direct download: YKAL-375final.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 1:00am EDT

I’ve talked about burnout many times on this podcast and I’m no stranger to it. In fact, in 2020, I took an 8-month break from Instagram partly due to burnout. So I wanted to have an expert on to talk specifically about this topic. Joining me to explore this widespread issue is two-time TEDx speaker, Joanna Denton. In 2014, after two burnouts in five years, Joanna decided to leave the tax world behind and change her life completely. Today, she's a speaking and executive coach for thought leaders, business executives, and entrepreneurs. 

Burnout is something many women struggle with - no matter their life’s circumstances and is more prevalent than we actually think. Together, Joanna and I discuss the different phases of burnout, the lessons Joanna learned from her journey back from it, and how to ask for help when you are feeling mentally or physically burnt out. 

  • Why it is so difficult for leaders to talk about burnout, and what can we do to make it easier. (6:20)
  • The difference between depression and burnout. (8:00)
  • Joanna’s burnout journey and how her life improved as a result of her burnouts. (12:18)
  • The biggest lessons Joanna learned during her journey back from burnout. (17:22)
  • Joanna’s book “The Different Truth", what the title means and how it encourages readers to start a conversation about choices and step into a new truth. (37:08)
  • Asking for help and being vulnerable. (45:47)

http://yourkickasslife.com/374

 

Direct download: YKAL-374final.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 1:00am EDT

Why are women perceived (or misunderstood) as angry? And, what can we do about it? That's just one of the many topics covered during my conversation with Leslie Lyons. Leslie is Founder of Bombshell Movement Studio in Chicago (a sensual movement studio), host of the Beyond the Pole: Tales from the CEO podcast, and a sales and leadership coach for female entrepreneurs. 

Together we also discuss embracing your “too muchness,” using your quiet strength to speak up, and exploring women’s empowerment in some nontraditional ways. We also have a very candid conversation about Christianity.

“The work of feminism, at the heart of it is liberation, and liberation starts with using your voice.” Leslie Lyons

In this episode you’ll hear:

  • Leslie’s personal story of how she came to her work as a leadership coach and owner of a sensual movement studio in Chicago.
  • Anger’s purpose and why women are perceived (and misunderstood) as angry and what we can do about it.
  • How a woman can embrace her ‘too-muchness’ “You weren’t put on this Earth to blend into the background.” 
  • Unshakeable leadership - what it is and some ways women can harness it.
  • We discuss Christianity, self-awareness, and how our spirituality evolved over time. 

http://yourkickasslife.com/373

 

Direct download: YKAL-373final.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 1:00am EDT

Hard conversations, resilience, and boundaries are some of the cornerstones of personal development. And, they happen to be some of the topics covered during this week’s show. Joining me to discuss all things personal development is my guest (and dear friend), Fawn Germer. Fawn is the best-selling author of nine books, including an Oprah Book. She is one of America's top women's leadership speakers and is the top-ranked woman on the prestigious Global Guru's List of best leadership and motivational speakers worldwide.

Together we discuss enduring great loss, coping with grief, and why boundaries are essential. When I think of one word to sum up our conversation, it is resilience. As Fawn so perfectly stated, “Every shitstorm ends.” And as her mother once told her, “It doesn’t matter what happens to you, it matters what you do with it.” 

🚨 Book Giveaway! 🚨 Tune in to hear how you can win a free copy of Fawn’s latest book, Coming Back! How to Win the Job You Want When You've Lost the Job You Need.

In this episode you’ll hear:

  • How a Google search which included the words, “Life Coach + Bullshit,” led to our long-lasting friendship. (4:32)
  • Why Fawn dislikes motivational speakers, even though she is one! Plus, her journey to becoming a motivational speaker and author. (7:00)
  • How Fawn endured a year of extreme loss - and why she says, “Every shitstorm ends.” (23:14)
  • The fastest way to stop a downward spiral. (28:01)
  • Uncomfortable conversations and how to make peace with them. (33:04)

http://yourkickasslife.com/372

Direct download: YKAL-372final.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 1:00am EDT

Laura Cathcart Robbins is back on the show this week! She joins me for an essential conversation about racism, how the lack of conversations about race can be scarring for children, and the pain and trauma of race relations between black and white women. Laura is a freelance culture writer and host of the popular podcast, The Only One In The Room. I am thrilled to have her back on the show!

And just to be clear: If we are going to make the world a better place and make ourselves better humans, we must continue to have conversations about race and do the work. Because when we are talking about women’s empowerment, we’re talking about feminism, and when we’re talking about feminism, we’re talking about patriarchy; and when we’re talking about patriarchy, we’re talking about white supremacy. It’s all connected. 

In this episode you’ll hear:

  • What white parents should be teaching their children about racism. (5:06)
  • Why black women find it hard to trust white women. “Some of us are dealing with unprecedented grief. We are broken with pain and unvalidated anger.”(20:12)
  • Laura offers an intimate glimpse into her interracial relationship and how the murders of George Floyd, Breonna Taylor, and Ahmaud Arbery affected it. (36:10)

http://yourkickasslife.com/371

 

Direct download: YKAL-371final.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 1:00am EDT

Happy Wednesday! It’s been a full week since we watched or listened in horror as rioters breached the U.S. Capitol. In this episode, I have a quick chat (before our interview) with Jessica Sharp, my personal friend, and DEI consultant. As I’ve conveyed before, personal development and social justice work are directly connected, so Jessica and I discuss our thoughts on, “This isn’t who we are” (referring to the U.S.) and more.   

Switching gears, when it comes to personal development and behaviors like perfectionism, people-pleasing, and over-achieving - the goal isn’t eradicating them. Instead, it’s recognizing when these behaviors jump into the driver’s seat and learning to draw on tools to help maneuver the road ahead. This week, Martina Barnes joins me to talk about these behaviors, how to recognize when they are taking over our “life bus,” and how to harness your reliable personal power. 

Martina G. Barnes is an experienced psychotherapist, life fulfillment coach, and master intuitive who helps high-achieving women transform the areas in their lives where they lack reliable personal power. She teaches women practical ways to shift how they show up for themselves and express Reliable Personal Power in every area of their lives.

In this episode you’ll hear:

  • Recognizing that personal development work and social justice work are interwoven. (5:16)
  • Common default behaviors women struggle with such as perfectionism, control, and people-pleasing and how Martina applies those behaviors to what she calls the “Life Bus” analogy. (20:00)
  • What blocks high-achieving women from having Reliable Personal Power. (25:20)
  • Not wanting to be perceived a certain way (ie: a bitch or aggressive, when standing up for yourself). (27:25)
  • Opening ourselves to deeper intimacy and friendships - courage brings so many beautiful rewards.  (34:10)
  • How trauma impacts connection to your intuition. (42:16)

http://yourkickasslife.com/370

 

Direct download: YKAL-370final.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 1:00am EDT

Last year was a year where many had a lot to carry. As we enter 2021, all of that heaviness won’t magically go away. But, as the new year approached I got to thinking about the new year and goals. I wanted to talk about it, but not in the usual ‘’Let's talk about goals, yahoo!” kind of way. So, Charlie Gilkey is back on the show! He offers a unique perspective on self-help, goals, and productivity.  

Charlie helps people start finishing the stuff that matters. He's the founder of Productive Flourishing, author of the book Start Finishing (2019) and The Small Business Lifecycle (2012), and host of the Productive Flourishing podcast. 

In this episode you’ll hear:

  • As we step into a new year, Charlie offers some ways you can be more present in your life. (7:35)
  • How and why you should identify your genius when it comes to tackling goals. Plus, why you should pay attention to the linguistics you use around your goals. (13:18)
  • How supporters, a support system, or a success pack can help you move forward with intention. (17:39)
  • Three strategies for tackling your plans and goals in order to finish strong. (40:48)

http://yourkickasslife.com/369

 

Direct download: YKAL-369final.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 1:00am EDT

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